Buffy Casablanca Poster poppy wreath  RS

My lady-love and I are still camping in the front yard; hopefully we'll start the move into a new apartment on the 2nd (when the other tenants move out.) I put up a tarp over the tent to protect us from the rain BY MYSELF for the first time - and it's lasted just fine, thank you *pats self on back*

Counting blessings: Today I was finally able, after many hours of frustration, to get ahold of someone from the state Department of Social Services about some benefits I'd been receiving that had been cut off at the beginning of the month - and within an hour she determined that my benefits had been cut off without cause, and restored them. Every once in a while someone restores my faith in humanity.

Have been listening to some new-to-us cassette tapes while I clean house during the day in the aftermath of the fire. I cannot tell you HOW MUCH I've missed having internet access - to bitch, to snark, to squee, the whole nine fandom yards. Listening to music makes me feel at least a little human again, especially Joan Armatrading. I've played her over and over the last couple of days: "Me, Myself and I," "Willow" "Love and Affection" but especially "The Weakness in Me." She just hits the spot every time.

But today I put on Nanci Griffith's Lonestar State of Mind and during the last song "There's a Light Beyond the Woods (Mary Margaret)" I started sobbing and I have no idea why. Is it the notion of a life-long friendship since childhood which the song describes and which I've never experienced? The intense lonliness of this experience after the fire, even if I'm experiencing it with someone else? Disappointment at a life unlived (mine)?

Or perhaps my sweetie got it right when she said "Maybe it was just time to cry."

I miss being able to just check out and have a little fandom fun here on LJ to take my mind off things. And I miss chatting with my friends here and keeping up with everything that's going on. (People say LJ fandom is dead? Try going away from it for several days involuntarily then realizing the amount of stuff you'll never be able to catch up on - it doesn't looks so very dead from that perspective!) Oh well....This too shall pass.
I am so glad that in the midst of all this chaos and trauma, good things like the restoration of your benefits have happened. *yay*


Gabrielle
I'm so sorry about all the trails you and your sweetie have to endure currently. *hugs* Hope you can move in on the 2nd and get thing heading back into the normal range. :)

LJ Fandom dead?? *Phish Tosh* I have heard nothing or refuse to hear about fandom death!
:Hugs: After all you guys have been through, like the song says, you can cry if you want to!
Ah, I love Joan Armatrading! Love and Affection is one of my favorite songs ever (and I love the others you mention as well). I hope your situation is all sorted very soon. *hugs*
Thanks sweetie! And isn't Joan the best? I've been on a kick re: her music for several months so finding those cassettes was fantastic. WHY IS SHE NOT MORE FAMOUS? And she's still touring and recording!
I think you are allowed a few tears. Woman's right to cry for any reason at all. Glad there is light on your horizon. Take care. You'll be chatting again soon.
*lol* When I was in my twenties I used to be embarrassed by my tendency to cry "easily" but an acquaintance said "You just feel things deeply" (which sounds tons better than "emotionally unstable", no?) I do so deeply loathe the notion that women's tears represent hysteria, weakness, etc - if you can't feel, you're dead.

Joan Armatrading is such a great singer.

I'm not surprised you needed a good cry. It can be very cathartic.

I know what you mean about LJ fandom not being as dead as people suppose. I was only away a few days a little while ago and I couldn't catch up.

*hugs*
I haven't cried like this for a while, either - the sort that just bubbles up from somewhere very deep inside of me type of cry.

And yes, Joan is just superb - and should be more famous. I think she's still recording and touring.

*hugs back*
These days I'm crying too listening some songs (In my case U2 and Damien Rice) for different reasons ... I can understand. Crying is a powerful expression and it releaves a lot of tension. *HUGS* Hope things get better soon for you!
I agree with everyone else. Sometimes having a good cry is cleansing and a way of moving forward. And I'm so pleased that you got your benefits back.
Thanks! I I feel weird referring to them as "my benefits" (even though I worked and paid taxes for decades damn it...) but it's harder for me to "come out of the closet" as someone who is receiving assistance than it was for me to come out as a lesbian (almost.) I can't tell you how they've saved my life in the last year, though. I'm super grateful for the help.

Getting that lady on the phone who actually went to bat for me was amazing.
Listen to your sweetie!

I'm glad you got one little piece of good news amidst all the trauma.
Hee! Sometimes my sweetie comes out with these little nuggest of wisdom that just take me by surprise and reminds me why I love her (and then she goes back to driving me up one side of the wall and down the other. That's life.)
Allllll the best to you! I just read what happened to you. Good thing you're alright (mostly), and yay! for victory over bureaucracy. ;)

Like a good tussle, a cry is good for the soul. :-)
Thank you muchly! And I have to say that "victory" is because of someone working in the bureaucracy - she told me she'd been at the job a long time, but she cared. She investigated and got back to me in minutes and fixed everything. It was so simple.

I know that people who work for "the state" in the US are overloaded and underfunded especially right now with the economy, but labrynthian rules don't help the situation! Still, any system is only as good as the people who participate in it. (As you well know!)
*hugs you tight*

It's perfectly okay for a song to make you sniffle and cry.

It's also perfectly okay to acknowledge that LJ fandom is still alive and well and I'm so glad to see that because there are so many awesome people around to keep it that way.
God all these hugs are so good for me! I do love hugs - I have my mom to thank for that! Thanks so much for the support sweetie.